Understanding the Circle of Security: A Relationship-Based Framework for Educational Leaders

In early childhood education, relationships are everything.

Whether we’re nurturing children, supporting educators, or engaging families, our ability to create secure, trusting relationships directly impacts learning, behaviour, and wellbeing.

One powerful framework that continues to transform early learning environments around the world is the Circle of Security. Originally developed from decades of attachment research, it offers a practical, visual model to help adults respond to the emotional needs of children in ways that promote safety, security, and resilience.

But its power doesn’t stop with children — the Circle of Security is just as transformative when applied to educational leadership and team culture.

What is the Circle of Security?

The Circle of Security (CoS) is an evidence-based approach designed to strengthen secure attachments between caregivers and children. It provides a visual map of the child’s emotional journey — how they go out to explore the world and return for comfort, connection, and co-regulation.

At the heart of the model is this message:

“Always be bigger, stronger, wiser, and kind.”

The Circle guides adults to:

• Support children as they explore

• Welcome them back when they return with emotional needs

• See beyond behaviours to the needs driving them

• Offer safety, boundaries, and connection simultaneously

Why It Matters in Early Childhood Education

Children’s ability to explore, learn, and self-regulate depends heavily on how safe and supported they feel. Secure relationships — with consistent, attuned, emotionally available adults — are the foundation.

When leaders and educators understand the Circle, they are better equipped to:

• Respond calmly to challenging behaviours

• Create emotionally safe learning environments

• Develop stronger connections with families

• Foster a culture of empathy and support among staff

The Circle of Security & Educational Leadership

Educational leaders are often the emotional anchor for their teams. When we apply the same principles of the Circle to leadership, we begin to see ourselves as a secure base and safe haven for educators.

This means:

• Offering support and psychological safety during times of stress or conflict

• Encouraging professional growth and exploration, knowing your team can return to you for guidance

• Setting clear boundaries while staying kind and attuned

• Leading with emotional intelligence and relational depth

When staff feel safe, seen, and supported, they can offer the same to children.

How to Implement the Circle of Security in Your Service

Ready to begin? Here are five ways to bring the Circle of Security to life in your early childhood setting:

1. Professional Development

Engage your team in Circle of Security training. You can bring in certified COS-P (Parenting) or COS-Classroom facilitators, or use reflective tools based on Circle principles in meetings and coaching.

2. Embed it in Reflective Practice

Make the Circle part of everyday conversation:

• “Where is the child on the Circle right now?”

• “What might they be needing from me?”

• “Where am I on the Circle when supporting this educator?”

3. Use it in Leadership Conversations

Lead with the mindset of “Bigger, Stronger, Wiser, and Kind” when mentoring or guiding staff. This supports emotional regulation, professional safety, and trust.

4. Support Family Engagement

Introduce families to the Circle during enrolment, in newsletters, or through parent workshops. Shared language about children’s emotional needs strengthens partnerships.

5. Model the Circle Yourself

Your team will mirror what you model. Stay calm in chaos. Offer boundaries with warmth. Be the “safe haven” for your staff — especially when times are tough.

Final Thoughts: Leading with Security and Heart

The Circle of Security reminds us that behaviour is communication — and that all humans, little or big, need connection, safety, and understanding.

As a leader, your influence sets the tone. When you foster a secure culture grounded in trust and relationships, you don’t just manage people — you nurture growth, wellbeing, and purpose.

Let’s build early learning environments where everyone — from the youngest child to the most experienced educator — feels safe to explore, return, and thrive.

Want support embedding the Circle of Security in your service?

Contact us or explore our professional learning workshops designed for leaders and educators.